When growing up, many people are told that human sexuality is morally wrong and that they should feel shame about any sexual impulses that they have. In reaction to this, some people have gone the other way, celebrating sexuality as morally right and claiming that sex should be indulged in as much as possible.
Looking at both these positions, many can feel like they don’t fit into either camp. Is there another way? Is it possible to see sexuality as neither right nor wrong, and simply look at it for what it is? What would we find then?
The Limitations of Compulsiveness
Sadhguru says, “food, sex, sleep and death, these are four things which are compulsive. A human being distinguishes himself or herself from animal nature just by conducting these aspects of life also consciously. If you do these things like any other creature on the planet, the moment you see somebody like that you say “it’s like an animal,” isn’t it? So, instinctually there is a certain compulsiveness, but you have an intelligence which can make you conscious and conduct that aspect of life consciously. If you don’t do that, then you see every day, you’re hearing about rapes and brutality and all kinds of things, it’s the same desire he has that any other man has, but he cannot conduct it in an aesthetically correct way, in a dignified way. His compulsions overtake his intelligence. So, first thing is, leave this nonsense about it being a sin, it being wrong, morality. That’s not the point. The important thing to understand is the limited nature of what it is.”
Transforming Longing
Sadhguru says, “once you become a human being, evolution is by choice. Will you evolve, or will you not? When you are a monkey, you did not choose to become human, but once you become a human being, what kind of human being do I want to be is your choice. At a certain moment of compulsion you may think I don’t have choice. No, you have choice. You have not learned how to exercise the choice. Still instincts are there, but you can conduct it by choice, not by compulsion. That’s the difference. All of you are born out of sex, but should you live for this for the rest of your life?”
“This is a choice. It is an element of your body, it is not the whole of it. It is an element of who you are, it is not the entirety of who you are. Essentially, it is a longing. What we long for can be transformed, isn’t it? When you are a child, you are longing for a peppermint. As you grow up, you long for something else. Right now, you’re a young adult, you’re longing for something, but longings keep changing, isn’t it? This longing, will it change by the compulsions of time or will it change by choice? By conscious choice.”
“It is not about “you must give up this, you must give up that, you must become like this, you must become like that.” There are also ways for that, that one who wants to transcend can transcend. It is not a giving up. If you transcend, you are free from everything. But, the most important thing is, even when you’re in it, are you a conscious choice or are you a compulsive animal?”
“This is the thing because the essential difference between a human being and an animal is their instinctive reaction to life. We are a conscious response to life. Exercise that. It’s all right, you don’t have to feel guilty. You don’t have to feel “oh, I am sexually driven, so I am not spiritual.” You’re driven, so you can make it into spiritual process. Instead of being driven, if you become the driver, that is the spiritual process. You want to be driven by something or you want to be the driver. If you are the driver, that is the spiritual process.”
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